It has been almost two months since I submitted my last homework assignment to Rasmussen College online, and it has been 3.5 months since I posted about my bout of senioritis. I hesitated to celebrate this accomplishment until I received this piece of paper in the mail! Not that I thought I had not succeeded in finishing or not that I was not ecstatic to be done with school, but somehow it did not feel real until I saw this official-looking document. I did not walk across a stage to receive this award and the only robe I wore was the bathrobe that I wore while I was working on the computer in my own home. Brody questioned why I would need to purchase a graduation robe when I had one already!
In thinking about what this degree means to me and to my future, I am struck by how sometimes when we accomplish something it does not feel like we thought it would. We as humans put so much effort into accomplishing what we feel like is the next big thing for us. The degree, the spouse, the first child, the first house, the new car, and the list goes on. But then when we get that thing that we worked so hard for what we often are left with is a little bit of a let-down. Not that we don’t love our husband or child, we just thought it would feel differently.
If I wrap up my whole identity in this little piece of paper that included 20 months of online college full-time finishing 108 credits while homeschooling 4 children and moving and learning a new business, I would feel devastated that there was not the flashing lights and confetti reaction that I was expecting.
Not that accomplishing this isn’t a step in the journey of life that God has for me, but it is not the final destination. If the goal of a wedding is your destination goal, you will not know how to live life after that moment. If the goal of having a child is your goal, but you have not thought of how to parent that child you will be frustrated and disillusioned that it is not just cuddling sweet-smelling babies but also involves smelly teenagers! The question is not “What is the next step?”, but more “Now that I am here, what would God have me do with it?”
So it is official that I completed….another step in my life’s journey and I am still just taking each step that God leads me to….stay tuned for where that might lead!